Tuesday, February 16, 2010

That's Not Punny.

Well I have found out why they call what editors read through a slush pile.


It's amazing the stuff that comes through. Now a lot of it is actually half way decent. Maybe the author just needs help in one or two areas, or maybe its a good story but just doesn't fit the magazine. But holy crow every once in a while you get one that just makes you scratch your head or want to vomit.

Now I'm learning that as far as writing goes there are rules that aren't rules but fads, there are rules that are rules and can't be broken, and then there are rules that should only be broken if you realize your doing it and doing it WELL.

I read something today that tried to fall into that third category and failed miserably. Take note. Bad puns are not enough to carry a story. Especially if the majority are crass and vulgar with no more reason to be in the story than to say a pun. If it doesn't progress the story toss it out.

So what about you all? Have you ever read anything that was utter slush? Or can you think of something that would be a perfect slush story? If I get a bunch of good replies I'll pick the best and get you a real slushie as a prize. :-)


  1. I'll take a blue coconut slush any day!

    But...there was this one time...I received a short romance story in about 4 different sizes of swirly pink font, the pages were all mixed up and numbered wrong. Plus the story had no plot.

    I'll ponder some more...see what I can remember.:-)

  2. I have definitely read some slush, but ouch, Jean, that sounds just awful. One of mine suffered from using "he said" and "she said" almost every time the characters talked. There were few action tags, so it was like the people stopped doing whatever they were doing, spoke, and then started again. In the same story it went back and forth between present and past tense.

    I just shook my head after that one.


  3. Puns are just lame. Honestly.

    I feel like your new post as editor is going to be quite an adventure! Can't wait to hear all about it.